NFL Archives - Jack Shine

In my article last week, The Player-Announcer Paradox, I examined the often divergent relationship between liking a player on the field, and liking him when he moves into the broadcast booth. It was heavily focused on Tony Romo in the aftermath of his DUI, a first offense that in Wisconsin isn’t even technically a crime — it’s a civil forfeiture. Now there’s no excuse for Tony Romo to be drinking and driving, but this was miles away from a scandal in NFL terms.

Romo has already been suspended by the network, and CBS intends to use this as a pretext for replacing Romo from the A-side of their broadcast lineup with J.J. Watt, at least temporarily. Watt boasts a much more “aw shucks” corporate friendly persona. A move that the network may have already been itching to make.

“It’s possible CBS Sports uses Romo’s slip-up as an excuse to move on” — Pro Football Network

The record-setting contract Romo signed in 2020 also appears to be part of the calculus for the move. The high-value deal made headlines at the time, but has since been dwarfed by contracts that followed it, including the $375m mega deal signed by Tom Brady to join Fox’s top-pairing Sunday broadcast.

“He squeezed them for every nickel” — Colin Cowherd on Romo’s 2020 negotiation, via Fox News

Romo has four years and $72 million left on that deal, and it’s left a sour taste in CBS’ mouth ever since. They could attempt to use a morality clause in the terms of the agreement to void the remaining salary.

“the worst contract in media history” — a top sports media executive on Romo’s deal, via Andrew Marchand of The Athletic Pro Football Network

The upside is that Tony Romo as a free agent with nothing to lose would once again be able to impart his actual football wisdom, something that has been greatly missing since CBS called for him to tone down his color commentary style.

It is nevertheless still shocking to see things play out this way. A non-incidental, first offense DUI is now a reason to end a man’s sports broadcasting career? I grew up in a time when it would to take perverted sexual fetishes to do such a thing.

Tony Romo photo by Keith Allison, via Wikimedia Commons. Licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.

Tony Romo was arrested for allegedly driving drunk in Milwaukee. I’m not going to go for any of the low hanging fruit like, “Man, how drunk do you have to be to get a DUI in Wisconsin?”

“The repercussions from Tony Romo’s DUI arrest are just beginning.” — New York Post

I’m not here to kick a man when he’s down. Something this did bring to mind is what I call the Player-to-Announcer Paradox.

I couldn’t stand Tony Romo as a player. When he fumbled the snap on the game-winning field goal attempt in the playoff game against Seattle, I was as happy as anyone else in the world. We watched the replay again and again.

Then he retired, went into the booth for CBS and became one of my all-time favorite color commentary guys.

He exhibited a wealth of knowledge on X’s and O’s, situational football, what the coach and quarterback were thinking, and he was predicting things with mystical precision. Then the normies watching got upset. They felt he was “ruining” the surprise of seeing what was to come. I felt like I was sitting next to a football oracle and loving it.

Now Tony Romo is paid $17 million a year not to do the thing he is uniquely capable of doing. He was neutered, and now people complain that his commentary is too vanilla, boring and corny. They won’t be happy either way.

Let Romo Romo. Let his fans, the self-described Romosexuals, enjoy his predictive and insightful commentary again.

But Romo isn’t the only example of the Player-to-Announcer Paradox. This seems to be more the rule than a rarity.

I loved watching LaDainian Tomlinson play, but I’m not much of a fan of him on the mic. Also, how ridiculous was it that he went by L.T.? There is only one L.T. Pick a different nickname.

I hated J.J. Watt. I got tired of the annual injuries, the “look how hard I’m working” offseason videos, and then ring chasing by going to the Cardinals of all teams. But in the booth? I love him. He comes across as authentic, knowledgeable and humorous.

Tom Brady was one of my favorite players ever. As an announcer, I think he’s become decent, but he still doesn’t seem truly comfortable. The cringe-core energy he’s giving out in the rest of his endeavors probably isn’t helping matters either. But nobody is getting pulled over for driving-while-alkalized.

I never saw Cris Collinsworth play, but I can confidently tell you I can’t stand him in the booth. The concept has caught on, and the “Patrick Mahomes” shoehorned references by him have become their own meme.

I’d probably still take ol’ Collinsworth over Kirk Herbstreit though. Being forced into a double-dose of Herbie on Thursday Night Football, and then Saturday night’s biggest college football game on ABC usually has me opting for TNF highlights on YouTube Friday morning instead of the Amazon broadcast.

It’s a weird phenomenon. Some of the guys I loved as players I don’t enjoy listening to. Some of the guys I couldn’t stand on Sundays become some of my favorite voices once they retire.

They’re two completely different roles.

The greatest color commentator alive is blackballed from the league and currently working for Barstool Sports. Mr. Jon Gruden. A Gruden comeback is a statistical impossibility due to his ongoing lawsuit against the NFL that he refuses to settle.

While I’d love to see Gruden burn Goodell’s reign of terror to the ground, I’d probably settle for the real Tony Romo being given his voice back.